Archbishops morality and abuse

The Archbishop of Canterbury has resigned. He had the opportunity to protect children from abuse but he didn't take it. There may have been other abusers but John Smyth is the most prominent. He was the barrister for Mary Whitehouse (a morality campaigner in the 1970s and 1980s). They were both Christians and Smyth ran Christian summer camps for young boys and men.

In Victoria Smith's book 'Hags' she quotes Helen Joyce and Louise Perry. She believes that older women like Mary Whitehouse protected younger women and children from predators like Jimmy Savile.

Not only did Mary Whitehouse not protect young people and children from abusers like John Smyth and Jimmy Savile (she presented Savile with an award) her type of older woman did great harm to young women. In Ireland they were insisting that pregnant teenage girls were sent to mother and baby homes or Magdalene Laundries. Unmarried pregnant girls weren't welcome in the community because they set a bad example to the others.

It wasn't that bad in England but this type of older woman smothered the happiness of young women in many different ways. They took a dim view of sex education and contraception. They were happy for young women to enter early marriage or work in a menial job as a factory worker, typist or servant.

It's interesting that Victoria Smith doesn't think that pornography causes anal pain in young women. I can't find anything in her book that states young men are demanding anal sex from young women because of pornography. Instead she goes back to the older idea that young women are forced to shave their pubic hair because young men never see it in pornography.

She doesn't state this clearly though. On page 188 there is this: "our aversion to pubic hair". On page 160 there is this: "Female pubic hair was still legal". Anyone who has looked at pornography knows that there is lots of pubic hair there. Despite its supposed ubiquity it seems that so many people haven't even looked at porn. She might not want people to think of her alongside 'conservative housewives, moral majority pearl-clutchers and no-sex-before-marriage fundamentalists'  (page 161) but they are obviously the congregation that she is preaching to.

It was Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols who tried to expose Jimmy Savile. The Punk movement might have favoured promiscuity but they didn't accept abusers. Unlike the Archbishop, Mary Whitehouse and her supporters. Here, that's an idea. Why don't we get John Lydon to be the next Archbishop of Canterbury?

review of Eve Was Shamed by Helena Kennedy

I am reading 'Eve Was Shamed' by Helena Kennedy QC. She is one of Britain's most distinguished lawyers and public figures. In chapter 5 (The Whore) she has some interesting things to say about sex work.

page 162 "Off-street sex workers usually operate from massage parlours or saunas or in accommodation where there are other women, or a 'maid' who keeps an eye out for oddballs and acts as a doorkeeper. Many 'maids' are women who were themselves at one time 'toms', as the police call prostitutes. Off-street sex is much less risky but unfortunately the Sexual Offences Act of 2003 criminalised the role of maid, making life for sex workers far less safe; it is also increasingly the venue for paid sex because arrangements are made on the Internet."

"The jury is still out on whether it [criminalising the purchase of sex] works or whether it simply drives the sale of sex underground with consequent higher risks for women. Unless there is better evidence from the places where this change has operated for a number of years, I remain very sceptical about the criminalisation of the male purchasers."

This is interesting because so many people believe that prostitution cannot be driven underground. In a debate in parliament the former MP Gavin Shuker said that if a punter can find a sex worker then so can the police. That's like saying that if a drug addict can find a drug dealer then so can the police.

As for evidence that the 'Swedish experiment' actually works, I have a lot of information on this blog including here.

page 163 "The laws against brothel-keeping still prevent two or three women sharing a flat for their work, which would reduce the risks of assault and provide companionship."

page 165 "I come at it as a feminist lawyer and would want to see evidence from a reliable source about the Swedish experiment and those in other jurisdictions to see if criminalising the purchase of sex actually works.

We must always look carefully at how law can be misused. The government's antisocial behaviour orders are now being used to bar women from certain streets or from associating with each other, although the original public rationale for the orders was about protecting the public from gangs of boys or bad neighbours creating a nuisance. Breach of an order can attract a maximum sentence of five years which means the reintroduction of imprisonment for prostitutes which had been removed in the Criminal Justice Act 1982. So while the rhetoric is all about helping women, England and Wales are fast becoming the most punitive countries in Europe for prostitutes."

page 169 After writing briefly about sex workers expecting poor treatment in courts particularly concerning the welfare of their children and the fact that mothers can find prostitution a convenient way to make a living she goes on to write about how the law affects their family life.

"Charges of living off immoral earnings were introduced to reach the pimps who exploited women and forced them into sexual misery. However, many women complain that in fact they make their own choices about how they earn a living, and the law is frequently used against boyfriends and husbands or family members who exercise no control over them at all. The effect is to prevent these women having any semblance of a home life. Taxi drivers, particularly minicab drivers, are sometimes charged with living off immoral earnings if they provide a regular service for prostitutes and facilitate their work. The same is true for landlords and massage-parlour and sauna owners if the police take against them."

Later in the chapter she writes about the Sexual Offenses Act 2003, the Modern Slavery Act 2015 and the Police and Crime Act 2009. She also mentions the National Referral Mechanism.

She finds persuasive a book called Illegal and Illicit: Sex Regulation and Social Control by Joanna Phoenix and Sarah Oerton. They show that the law operates to the detriment of some women who choose prostitution voluntarily.

On page 163 she writes about the case of Margaret MacDonald who was sentenced to four years imprisonment. 'These are women who would rather be sex workers than cleaners or care workers, as they earn much more money doing it, and until women's work is better paid, they want to carry on without interference.'

On page 177 she looks favourably on reforms in the Australian state of Victoria and in Holland.

There are a couple of things I am unhappy about though with her book. On page 161 she writes 'Three-quarters of those involved in prostitution in Britain entered street prostitution before their 18th birthday'. She doesn't give a reference but it seems to come from a 1995 study 'Street prostitution: Ten facts in search of a policy' by Benson and Matthews. This is clearly about street prostitution and not prostitution in general but even so I don't believe it.

On page 162 she gives more statistics including '68% met the criteria for post-traumatic stress disorder' (whatever that means). Helena Kennedy should realise that the 'research' of Melissa Farley is flawed. Overall though, I think it is a good book. She makes a lot of sense.

On page 170 she writes about women getting deported after police raids and mentions other forms of trafficking such as trafficking for cheap labour or domestic servitude 'doing back-breaking agricultural jobs or cockle picking or poultry cleaning and packing, living in inhumane conditions and being paid well below the minimum wage'. This is important because these issues tend to be ignored by people who support police crackdowns on prostitution.

On page 178 she also writes 'Saving women from prostitution must also mean removing sexual and economic inequalities, providing job opportunities, training and equal pay - in other words by recognising the economic realities which drive most women to the streets'.

I wasn't aware of the cases of Vishal Chaudhary and Tatiana Shmyrova, two traffickers who exploited their victims terribly. It just goes to show that some trafficking is heinous. She doesn't seem to be aware though that some people are convicted of trafficking who have never coerced anyone. In the case of Mark Viner for example there is no suggestion that he coerced the women involved.

Instead the police say that women were raped or robbed, although it is not clear whether this happened in somewhere set up by Mark Viner: "That is the very dark world traffickers like Mark Viner are bringing women into and it's why it's so important we continue to break the cycle".  Also, the present law is part of the problem: "They do this because they know we will not call the police because they know we work in brothels which is not legal".

You might wonder why I am sticking up for a trafficker, but we need to create a system where women don't get raped or robbed. Women come to Britain on tourist visas to get money for things like university fees, get deported (not rescued), then try to get back to Britain to continue as sex workers. This is all in the television series about Viner.

The law has to be able to distinguish between someone who has not coerced anyone and who protects them from rape and robbery, and someone like Vishal Chaudhary. I'm not saying that Mark Viner should have been allowed to get away with what he did. The law needs to be able to distinguish between a pimp who makes money from sex workers, and two or three sex workers working together for safety. Trafficking and brothel keeping-keeping are not always what they seem to the public.

meet Asami

I have had a video for a couple of years, part of my collection. It shows a young Japanese woman pretending to be a tour guide on a coach. She has sex with several men on the coach. She is wearing the uniform of tour guides, with a yellow jacket and hat.

I found out that her name is Asami and if you buy the DVD there is another video of her having sex at a hot spring or spa. I found out that there are other DVDs, one where she is a nurse. This is not soft porn, you see her having full sex and seeming to enjoy it.

In none of these films is there any slapping or strangling. At least, in none of her pornographic films. I found out just recently though that in Japan she is a well recognised and well respected mainstream actress of horror movies. Many of them extremely violent.

I found out that her full name is Asami Sugiura, in Japanese 杉浦 亜紗美. She's not as pretty as some of the women in Japanese pornographic videos, such as Kotomi Asakura, Iori Mizuki and Aika in her early days. Kotomi has also made the move from hard core pornography into mainstream movies.

Perhaps Asami's most violent movie was The Machine Girl which 'is particularly famous for its over-the-top violence and gore, featuring scenes with extreme action and bloodshed'.

I was listening to a radio programme last night which said that teenage boys are watching pornographic videos featuring slapping and strangling. Teenage girls are suffering because they are getting slapped and strangled. Yet most pornographic videos do not have slapping or strangling. So how is it that teenage boys will see it as normal?

It reminds me of a forum where people were saying that pornography is causing a rise in popularity in anal sex leading to pain and bleeding for girls. They cited some research which they thought would back their claim. Yet if you looked at the research, the recent rise is said to be due to 'TV shows including Sex and the City and Fleabag'.

So do we need to ban Sex and the City and Fleabag? As well as horror and action movies? They're not going to want that. Even though it might save teenage girls from sore bottoms and other places.

I am showing you a picture below of Asami in the film 'The Machine Girl' and another from the film 'Gun Woman'. There is another picture from Gun Woman that shows her naked and covered in blood and shooting. I'm not showing that one because I don't like it. I won't be watching any of her horror or action movies. I don't like them.

What really annoys me is that when I tried to find out about Asami on Microsoft Bing Copilot (AI) it wouldn't let me. I could find out about her co-star in The Machine Girl, Minase Yashiro. So it doesn't have a problem with extreme violence. That must be a bit confusing for any horror or action fans who aren't aware of her coach excursions.

I have got more than one blog, all with Google Blogger. Most of them are not controversial. When I try to look at these blogs I can see them no problem. When I try to look at my sex blog it will not let me and often say something stupid about security certificates or something.

It annoys me because if you are going to censor you should at least have the decency to say that you are censoring and not tell a lie. It isn't moral to tell lies. It isn't moral to stop people from seeing information that could help them make an informed choice about social and moral issues.

review of The Wisdom of Whores

review of The Wisdom of Whores by Elizabeth Pisani

Elizabeth Pisani is an expert in AIDS and has advised governments. She has a lot of knowledge about prostitution in many countries.

The most interesting chapter for me was chapter 6. She was working in East Timor for the health ministry. She was on a flight to the capital Dili and she decided to talk to two Chinese women who she suspected were sex workers.

"I found out that a local businessman was offering girls three-month stints selling sex to the Chinese community in Dili. 'We were really lucky to get in,' said one girl. They got the nod from a friend who had done the run six months earlier. 'She bought a car when she got home.'"

She goes on to write that most women sell sex for the same reason they do other jobs, to make money. Sex work though can earn them sixteen times more. It varies from country to country. Slavery is 'relatively rare'.

"For many women, selling sex is a job with a fair degree of freedom and for some there's job satisfaction, too. Many clients want far more than just a quick orgasm. They want companionship, advice on how to cope with girl trouble, pampering to help them forget a lover's death or a business deal gone wrong. They want their confidence boosted or their scars healed, they want to learn new tricks in bed or they just want a massage or a cuddle. A skilful sex worker will read and fulfil her client's needs, and many will be well rewarded for doing so."

When she was talking to sex workers in China, even though she was talking to women from the Bai ethnic minority who are 'on the bottom rung of the prostitution ladder', she found that they turned away many clients because they didn't offer them enough money.

"The 'all sex workers are trafficked' ideologues may damn me for saying so, but these ethnic minority women, working at the bottom end of the sex trade in one of the poorer areas in China, did not seem to be driven by desperation.''

Conservative Christians in the United States find this impossible to accept. Brenda Zurita for example stated 'Prostitution and sexual trafficking are inextricably linked and abolition is the only answer to end the horrors of both.'

Brazil did well in its fight against AIDS, but they were refused funding by the US because they wouldn't sign the loyalty oath against prostitution.

"The loyalty oath is based on the belief, no, the absolute conviction, that anything that improves work conditions for prostitutes serves only to bind them to slavery. The High Priestess of this view is a US academic named Donna Hughes, who pontificates on the evil of commercial sex from every available pulpit. In an op-ed titled 'Aiding and Abetting the Slave Trade', she railed at a programme that taught Cambodian sex workers to negotiate condom use with their clients."

This programme helped reduce new HIV infections in Cambodia from 42,000 a year to 6,000 a year.

"'The Bush administration needs to ... shut down unethical "interventions" with women and girls in brothels. Those who lack the moral capacity to know that slaves need freedom should never get funding again,' preached Hughes."

Pisani goes on to write about the International Justice Mission. They are an Evangelical Christian NGO that raids brothels to free slaves (as they see it). The women who are 'rescued' end up deported or detained. They often try to escape. They don't want to make T-shirts for small change, which is the sort of alternative offered to them.

This book was published in 2008, and it seems that IJM has changed its methods since then.

In chapter 4 Pisani writes that some sex workers have 5 or 6 clients a night, but most have fewer than that. In Thailand, Cambodia and some Indian states they averaged 20 clients per week - although it is lower than that now. This is more than in East Timor (3 per week), the Philippines (2 per week) or China and Indonesia (5 or 6 in a good week).

There are people who will tell you that sex workers are raped 20 or 30 times a day. Some of these people are Christian Evangelicals, some of them are Radical Feminists. There are others who should know better but who have been told lies by the Christians and the Radical Feminists. I don't believe them, I believe the experts such as Elizabeth Pisani.

election results in central Bristol

It just goes to show how little the Nordic model is important to the British public. We've just had a general election and it wasn't an issue at all as far as I can see. Even though an active supporter of the Nordic model has been displaced by someone who (possibly) believes in decriminalization. So I'm not worried that the Nordic model might come to Britain as it has in Ireland.

Thangam Debbonaire is not only a supporter of the Nordic model she has called on Bristol City Council to stop issuing licences to strip clubs in the city. She was Labour MP for Bristol Central and has been replaced by Carla Denyer of the Green party. Carla Denyer opposed the strip club ban. I don't know what her views on the decriminalization of sex work. I do know that leading  members of the Green party believe in it eg Natalie Bennett, and Caroline Lucas too.

Thangam Debbonaire was vice-chair of the All Party Parliamentary Group 'Prostitution and the Global Sex Trade'. They all believe in the Nordic model there.

Curiously, I have just been looking at some research in Inner-city Bristol. I read in one study that in the UK up to 46% of female sex workers report anxiety or depression. This study gives as reference another study, of sex workers in Inner-city Bristol. However, I can't find this 46% figure here, not about anxiety or depression. All I can find is 'When asked the reasons for going to a GP, the commonest reason was depression or anxiety, given by 34% (24/71)'. So the figure is 34%, not 46%. They were a small group (71) of drug-addicted street-based sex workers ('Those sex workers who work on the street, rather than in premises such as massage parlours, appear to be the most at risk.'). They are not representative of sex workers in Britain.

I can't understand how this mistake has happened. It might be because 46% had been screened for sexually transmitted infection in the previous year (somehow this number got used instead of the correct 34%). It might be because 46% is a figure used for the general population. "A Eurobarometer survey conducted in June 2023 revealed that almost 1 in 2 people (46% of the EU population) had experienced emotional or psychosocial problems, such as feeling depressed or anxious, in the previous 12 months."

So sex workers have less anxiety or depression as the general population? No, of course not. It just goes to show that there's a lot of misinformation out there.

That doesn't mean that the first of the two studies was rubbish. I shall quote the important conclusions below. It is saying that the Nordic model harms women.

"How effective are different international approaches at addressing any harms associated with buying and selling sex?

As mentioned above, studies highlighted that in Sweden and Canada, criminalisation of clients did not improve access to services nor reduce sex workers’ experiences of violence. Evidence included in our qualitative synthesis clearly shows that criminalisation of clients does not facilitate access to services, nor reduce violence against sex workers. This is supported by the epidemiological evidence from Vancouver that showed that the introduction of more severe laws against the purchase of sex alongside fewer sanctions for sex workers (modelled on the Swedish Law) did not result in reduced violence from clients.

Despite the fact the Swedish Law was motivated by a desire to end the demand for sex work, findings from our qualitative synthesis suggest that these enforcement strategies that seek to reduce the numbers of sex workers or clients are unlikely to achieve these effects, since the economic needs of sex workers remain unchanged, resulting in sex workers having to work longer hours, accept greater risks, and deprioritise health. There is no reliable evidence from Sweden that the numbers of sex workers have decreased since the law changed in 1999.

In New Zealand, following decriminalisation, sex workers reported being better able to refuse clients and insist on condom use, amid improved relationships with police and managers. However, migrants continue to be excluded from this system. Studies in Guatemala, Mexico, Turkey and Nevada, US showed how regulatory models exacerbate disparities within sex worker communities. They enabled access to safer conditions for some, but excluded the majority (including the most marginalised).  Under these models non-compliance with regulatory systems including working in tolerance zones, regulator venues and/or mandatory registration at a health care facility and mandatory HIV/STI testing results in criminalisation.  

In conclusion, the public health evidence supports decriminalisation, when coupled with inclusive policies to protect the safety and health of sex workers, including the funding and scale-up of specialist and sex-worker-led services that help address the multiple and diverse health and social care needs of people who sell sex."

I think I spoke too soon. Jess Phillips is now Parliamentary Under-Secretary of State in the Home Office. She is a supporter of the Nordic model and has been a member of the All Party Parliamentary Group 'Prostitution and the Global Sex Trade'. Diana Johnson is another one to look out for.

This Guardian article makes so many mistakes it is difficult to know where to start. It is about prostitution and the murder of women. Curiously, there is a link at the side of this page to a page about murdered women. I say curiously, because none of them seem to have been murdered by a pimp or a punter. Fifty women killed by men this year so far and not one was a sex worker. As far as I can tell, I haven't bothered to read it through.

Soho is a hotbed of prostitution yet no sex worker has been murdered there since the 1940s. That's probably because each sex worker has a 'maid' which means they are never alone in a flat with a man. So if you really want to reduce murder of women then change the law so that women can work together.

I've just been looking at the Jess Phillips new book. I looked in the index for 'prostitution', 'sex work' and 'Nordic model' and it seems there is nothing in there about any of them.

Pink Lane

I had a little holiday in Newcastle and I hadn't planned to have any sexual adventures. I hadn't taken my viagra with me or my thin condoms. Looking on the Internet I could see that there was an alleyway called Pink Lane where there are three massage establishments. So of course I decided to wander along Pink Lane to have a look at what was going on.

I hadn't realised that there are two parts of Pink Lane on either side of a main road. The part that I found was short and had two Chinese massage establishments next to each other. They looked quite professional and I went into one of them. The woman was middle-aged to elderly. While I was having the massage on the massage table she asked if I wanted anything else.

The problem is she couldn't speak English. She used her smartphone to translate. It seemed that the only thing on offer was hand relief (also known as 'happy ending'). I didn't want that so I said I would have just massage.

Two days later I went next door to the other Chinese massage place. This time the woman wouldn't take no for an answer. Full sex wasn't available but I ended up paying £90. I can't remember what we did because I'm not sure if I'm confusing her with another woman I saw the next week in Pink Lane but it probably involved her taking her clothes off and me touching her.

Later that afternoon I decided to try to find out about another Chinese massage establishment. This is in Low Friar Street, another alleyway not far from Pink Lane. It seems to have two names. Shanghai Massage and Secret Massage Centre.

This might have been the same day I explored the other part of Pink Lane. It has a Thai massage establishment. The front of the place was unusual, made to look like a Thai building. It is called No 1 Thai Massage. I rang the bell and someone who looked like a ladyboy opened the door and told me they were fully booked till later.

Shanghai Massage was a very enjoyable experience. I saw a young woman who was very attractive. She is called Emily and she looks like Myleene Klass. I ended up spending £90 with her too. This time I really enjoyed it. We didn't have full sex but we had a lot of fun. At one time I asked her to lie down on the massage table and I had a look at her pussy. When I left I promised that I would see her again, which I fully intended to do.

The next week I wanted to go back. I wanted to see Emily again but even more I wanted to see another woman who I had glimpsed when I was there. She was beautiful, even more beautiful than Emily. I could have booked to see Emily but I thought I would take my chances. However, I had forgotten where it was. I went to Pink Lane.

I went into one place where there was the same woman I had seen before (Yoyo?). I didn't want to see her again so I went to the other place next door. A woman I hadn't seen before was there and I ended up handing over lots of money to her. No full sex but she took off all her clothes and let me touch her. I would have given her just the £30 for the massage alone but she wouldn't take no for an answer. She lifted up her top and moved  my hand to her breast. That's how it started. I won't tell you where my hand ended up or at least my fingers.

Then I remembered where Emily worked. I made my way to Low Friar Street. The other woman I had noticed was there and she gave me my massage. I glimpsed another pretty woman. Coco massaged me then offered to take her clothes off and let me touch her. She also suggested I have a two girl massage. She was very persuasive and so another woman came in and took her clothes off. It was Emily.

Emily didn't stay for long though. While she did I enjoyed being massaged by two very attractive naked women. They didn't just use their hands. After the massage I saw yet another attractive woman there. Coco explained that she had just come over from Shanghai. She seemed to be very helpful, she held the door open for me. So there are at least four attractive young women at Shanghai Massage.

I spent a lot more money than I had intended but I don't regret it.

Pink Lane is also known for a bakery and for rare and unusual coffee.

books about sex work

I have just finished reading a new book about sex work called Unashamed: A memoir by Elizabeth G. I'm not going to review it although I have reviewed other positive books about sex work, namely Paying For It by Scarlett O'Kelly and Lucky Girl by Violet Ivy. All three of these books were written by sex workers or ex-sex workers.

There is a new article on the Feminist Current site by Meghan Murphy. In this article she writes:-

"Despite my efforts over the last decade+ to explain my position, which was developed through study of various legislative models throughout the world as well as through interviewing and reading the work of countless experts on prostitution, including women who were once prostituted themselves, but had managed to exit the trade, freed to assess their situation clearly and speak the truth about the industry, the accusation remains the same."

It is commonly asserted by Radical Feminists that a women can't 'assess their situation clearly' while they are still in the sex industry. Once they have left then they are all against it. However, we can see clearly from the three books I have mentioned that this is not the truth. It is an attempt to silence sex workers.

I am not sure if these three books were written by sex workers or ex-sex workers. To my mind it doesn't matter. Dr Brooke Magnanti is an ex-sex worker though and she doesn't back the Radical Feminists. They would say that she is a 'tourist' and unrepresentative of the majority of 'prostituted' women. As I have written elsewhere, there are many different types of sex worker, and escorts are as representative as anyone is.

They might talk about 'luxury beliefs'. If you believe in the Nordic model you can accuse people who believe in decriminalisation of having luxury beliefs. Well, that's all going to depend on whether you think that the Nordic model reduces demand, reduces murder, stops women from being arrested and helps them to leave. Much of this blog is looking at the evidence for all of these things.

To my mind though whether somebody has luxury beliefs also depends on how willing people are to find out the facts. If you can't be bothered then don't accuse others of luxury beliefs. Don't pretend that your motivation is helping women. If you insist, for example, that 'the Nordic model has demonstrated that it is possible to curb demand' (see Murphy's article) despite having been told that the statistics you use are wrong, then you are the one holding luxury beliefs.

The Nordic model lobby aren't going to like Unashamed. They are not going to like Stacey Dooley's programme about Nevada prostitution. Just like they didn't like the similar programme about the Sheffield brothel. The Nevada sex workers seemed to be having a great time. They will say not all sex workers are like that. This is of course true, but the point is that it could be true of many more of them. It's our choice (or American or Nevada voters). What isn't our choice is to curb demand.

Many people think that prostitution is legal in Nevada. The fact is that individual counties within Nevada can choose to allow it. Wouldn't it be great if one county allowed a form of prostitution where the women themselves make the rules and take the profit? No mega brothels allowed, only something like the SOOBs they have in New Zealand.

review of Feminism by Deborah Cameron

This is an introduction to feminist theory and shows both sides of the debate. There is one chapter, Sex, that is of interest to me. She confirms that many of the earliest feminists had negative attitudes towards sexual desire.

“Historians of the first wave generally agree that feminist discussions of sex in the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries were dominated by the impulse to protect women from sexual danger and to reform ‘the beast in man’ (though there were some feminists who contested this, campaigning for women’s access to birth control, abortion, sex education and the freedom to have sex outside marriage).”

The second wave was more positive about sexuality. There were though feminist ‘sex wars’ in the 1980s.

Pornography is said to influence women to behave in ways that they don’t truly enjoy. For example, a woman posting anonymously on Twitter stated that male sexual partners had criticised her for refusing to participate in group sex.

This seems very odd to me. I have never participated in group sex, neither would I want to. I know that group sex is common in pornography but that hasn’t made me feel that it is common in reality. Very few people have done it or would want to do it. I would estimate that less than 1% of the population have tried it. So why would anyone get the idea that only a prude would not want to participate in it? It seems to me that she should have chosen her sexual partners more carefully, either choosing men who are more intelligent or less selfish.

Sex work and the Nordic model are discussed. According to Cameron there are two reasons why some people want the Nordic model. One reason is that ‘the existence of a market where men can buy sexual consent both reflects and reinforces the inequality between the sexes’.

This argument has never made much sense to me. For it to make sense you would have to show that sex is different from other pleasures in life. I haven’t seen a convincing argument for that. For many people it is different. If you have a fear and disgust of basic human sexuality you will feel that, especially if you have chosen celibacy. Most people don’t feel that way though. We all buy other people’s consent every day.

The other reason is that ‘sex should be an exchange based on mutual desire’. I don’t believe that’s the real reason. I rarely hear that argument. It doesn’t make much sense anyway. If I go on a minibus trip to the Lake District I would enjoy it as would the other passengers. The driver might not. As long as he or she is not exploited and has chosen this way of making money I am happy with that.

If I pay for sex, I will enjoy the sex and she will enjoy the money. As long as we both get what we want then we will both be happy.

The more usual stated reason for wanting the Nordic model is that the welfare of women will be improved. We all want the welfare of women to be improved but only some of us are willing to look at the facts of the matter. Does the Nordic model decrease demand? Do women continue to be arrested? Are they helped to leave if they choose? It’s not so difficult to find the facts if you really want them and you are not gullible.

The real reason why some people want the Nordic model is because they hate men like me. I am the type of man that some women think they have a right to hate. They think that the Nordic model will make life more difficult for men like me, and they don’t care how many women are harmed in the process.

They can’t even get that right. Any sane sober man can avoid detection in Nordic model countries. They will only ever get a fine anyway, unlike the young women who are sent to prison for ‘brothel-keeping’. Not all punters are the same. Some are happy to negotiate with a pimp. Others, like me, prefer to negotiate with the sex worker herself. A woman should not be told ‘If you work here you have to do oral sex without a condom’. She should be able to decide for herself, and I have always been happy to comply with her choices.

Cameron states that the Nordic model decriminalises women. It doesn’t. She writes that it is intended to decrease demand. It doesn’t. Neither is much money spent to help women exit.

We should all agree that sex workers should not be arrested and resources should be allocated to help women and men to exit if they so choose. So why can’t we just do that? Evangelicals like Jim Wells, nuns like the ones who founded Ruhama and Radical Feminists like Julie Bindel would never agree. They would say that we can’t have these unless we also criminalise men who pay for sex. Not only does that not make sense, they are insincere. They don’t care about the women.

Cameron states the advantages of decriminalisation.

“They could set up small businesses or co-operatives with other women, instead of depending on the pimps and organised criminals who are powerful players in the illegal trade.”

On the other side of the argument, women risk being assaulted or killed. No sex workers have been killed in Soho since the 1940s, they are never alone in the flat with a customer.

Germany is not a good place for sex workers, the Netherlands is OK, and things are good in New Zealand. Sex workers can be arrested in Germany and the Netherlands but not in New Zealand. In New Zealand workers reap the financial rewards, not ‘wealthy investors and entrepreneurs’.

The last part of this chapter is all to do with heterosexual sex being ‘inherently problematic’ even when it has nothing to do with prostitution. Some feminists choose celibacy. They don’t think women should be having sex with men. So obviously they think women shouldn’t be having sex with me, whether I pay them or not.

Other feminists choose lesbianism. I was aware of the views of Catharine A MacKinnon and Andrea Dworkin. Also more recent authors such as Sheila Jeffreys and Julie Bindel. Deborah Cameron mentions two other authors who espoused lesbianism, Monique Wittig and Adrienne Rich.

my trip to London

A couple of years ago I had a day trip to London. I wrote about that. On Monday I went to London again only this time I had booked a hotel. So I had three days and two nights in London. I saw a few women in Soho and I will tell you about five of them.

Tamara of 52 Greek Street

I had done my research and I knew that Tamara seems to be the most popular girl in Soho at the moment. Obviously I wanted to see her. She is Indian and I found her incredibly attractive. She told me she is twenty five years old. She is superfriendly and it was one of my best experiences. She has dark skin and black hair. Medium height. I had taken a viagra and was able to shag her. I didn't manage to orgasm but then I wasn't expecting to. I had only paid £30 which is the minimum and gets you only ten minutes.

Sabrina of 8 Greek Street

Sabrina is completely different from Tamara. A lot older for a start and bigger. I've had a fascination with Sabrina for years. There's something very earthy about Sabrina. Many years ago I was in the room below hers and I heard her bedsprings going. Someone was giving her a good seeing to. I wanted to do that too. So on Monday I did. I used to think that Sabrina was plain. In the room though I realised she is attractive. She is friendly too.

Sonia of 4 Lisle Street

I've had photos of Sonia for years and I thought she's very nice looking. I sat with the maid for a while then this beautiful young woman walked in. It took me a while because she looks older in the photos then I said to her "I've seen your photo. On the internet". She was surprised and wanted to know where. Her maid said other men have said they've seen photos of her.

Her face reminds me of Kelly Brook and maybe Lucy Montgomery. She's that pretty, with bright eyes. There was something about her that put me off though. Unlike with Tamara and Sabrina I found it difficult to get an erection. Someone on the internet said that if she likes you, you will have a nice time with her. If she doesn't like you, you won't.

Sonia

my own photo - you can see it is the same room by the mirror tiles

Adele of Greens Court

I saw an ordinary Romanian girl called Adele. She's pretty enough and friendly. Not only was I able to get an erection and shag her but I ejaculated too. So ended my first day in London.

The next day I tried to see Tamara again. I went back to the walk down several times but each time there were two men waiting for her. The last time there was a man on the stairs too. The maid came up the stairs and said that the same man keeps rebooking her. I said can I come back 11 am tomorrow. She said it won't be Tamara then, it will be Adele. I asked if this is the Romanian girl and she said yes.

When I went back to Greek Street the next morning I could see Sabrina and another woman sitting outside the cafe opposite number 8. It got past 11 am but the door to 52 remained closed.

Carole of 8 Greek Street

She was a big plain Brazilian woman. About 40. Just what I needed though and within the ten minutes I ejaculated while on top of her. When I left it was just before midday but the door of number 52 was still closed.

doorbells at 8 Greek Street

statistics from Sweden

I have found more statistics that show that the Nordic model in Sweden is failing. I have put all the relevant information from surveys in Sweden on this page. I hadn't realised that there was a survey in 2017. I knew about the surveys in 1996, 2008, 2011 and 2014.

In 1999 Sweden introduced a law (the 'Nordic model') that criminalises men who pay for sex. We have statistics from before and after the law about the proportion of Swedish men who pay and the proportion of Swedish women who are paid for sex. There were many more women who stated in the 2017 survey that they had been paid for sex than in any of the other surveys. In 2017 it was 1.5%. In 1996 it was 0.3%.