review of Burn It Down by Breanne Fahs

I came across a book by the American feminist writer Breanne Fahs. It is called 'Burn It Down!'. It is a collection of feminist writings on a number of subjects. The two chapters that were of interest to me were Chapter 51 entitled 'Feminist Manifesto to Support the Rights of Sex Workers' by an organization called Feminists for Sex Workers and Chapter 30 which is the words of Andrea Dworkin.

You can get the impression that feminists believe that prostitution should be banned. That they believe in the Nordic or Swedish model where men are arrested for paying for sex. The truth though is that many if not most feminists don't believe that.

There are 11 points made in Chapter 51. Each is a paragraph with the first sentence in bold text. It's worth me replicating each of these sentences below.

1. We acknowledge sex workers as experts in their own lives and needs.
2. We respect sex workers' decision to engage in sex work.
3. We affirm sex workers' ability to claim consent.
4. We advocate for measures that provide real help and support to victims of trafficking, with full respect for the protection of their human and labour rights.
5. We fight to eliminate all forms of violence against sex workers.
6. We work every day to end misogyny in all spheres of life.
7. We respect migrants’ rights.
8. We respect LGBT rights.
9. We call for full decriminalisation of sex work.
10. We speak up against women's increasing precarisation in labour.
11. We demand the inclusion of sex workers in the feminist movement.

I agree with each of these points. When Amnesty International found out how women are being harmed in Nordic model countries they were accused of promoting the views of pimps. It is clear though that they are promoting the views of many feminists. I don't know who the Feminists for Sex Workers group are, but if Breanne Fahs agrees with them then this must be a mainstream opinion within feminism. What's more, this isn't a watered-down form of feminism - Fahs sees herself as a revolutionary.

They say it is wrong for people to say that women 'sell their bodies' or 'sell themselves'. And that a client buys a woman's body or a woman's consent. And the other false idea that a client can do what he wants to a woman; this has 'dangerous real life consequences for sex workers'.

They say that the Nordic or Swedish model and similar systems 'harm sex workers'. 'The Swedish model pushes them into poverty, reduces their power in negotiations with clients, criminalises them for working together for safety, evicts and deports them.'

Chapter 30 is an excerpt from Andrea Dworkin's influential 1987 book 'Intercourse'. Dworkin believes that when a man has sex with a woman he possesses her. She becomes like a slave. 'The normal fuck by a normal man is taken to be an act of invasion and ownership undertaken in a mode of predation: colonializing, forceful (manly) or nearly violent; the sexual act that by its nature makes her his.'

This confirms what I have learned from other sources that this type of feminist - the Radical Feminist - believes that any time a man and woman have sex it objectifies the woman. That is why they believe women should become lesbians. A lesbian - political lesbian - is a woman who doesn't have sex with men. She doesn't necessarily have sex with other women.

They oppose prostitution because it is one of the ways that men and women have sex. They're not going to tell you that though. They are going to pretend that they are doing it for the welfare of prostitutes. No wonder they hate Amnesty International and will do anything to stop them exposing the harm done to women by the Nordic model.

before lockdown

I've had a look at the guidelines and it doesn't say anything about having sex with prostitutes. Even so I have avoided it recently. Also I don't like standing in queues. I'm joking of course, all the brothels have closed. So it's not true what they say about prostitutes spreading disease.

I did have two pleasant experiences before lockdown though. I went to a Thai massage place in Liverpool. I asked for Kim and the girl said she's not here today. I had seen Kim three times last year and she was lovely. The girl suggested that I look at all four of them there and choose one. I hesitated but she insisted and went out the back. It seemed to amuse her.

This has not happened to me before. It must be that they weren't busy. Perhaps they were a bit bored.

Each of the three others came into the room, one at a time. One was called Jessica and I remember I saw a Jessica a long time ago but couldn't recognize the face. One was Nicky who I have seen a few times over the years. She hesitated in the doorway. She's a pretty girl and didn't need to be wearing so much makeup. I have called her Vicky in previous posts because I didn't want to reveal her name, but as long as I don't tell you the name of the place it should be ok.

The one I chose was Katie. She is older but nice to look at. She started the massage then asked if I wanted any extras. I hadn't taken a viagra because I wasn't really looking for a sexual experience. I told her I would give her some money if she played with my willy but don't try too hard because I probably won't get an erection and I'm not going to have an orgasm.

We talked about what I had done with Kim. I said she had shown me her pussy. With the lights full on. She had let me touch it but not let me put my finger inside. I told her that I have seen Nicky but she doesn't like me. She doesn't like the way that I look at her even though I told her it's just because she's so pretty. Katie said maybe it's just that she's shy. I thought if you're shy you're unlikely to tell a man you don't like the way he looks at you.

I did get an erection but I didn't orgasm. I wouldn't have orgasmed even if I had taken a viagra. I can't come that way. Although I did have one orgasm with Kim last year, I wanked myself to orgasm when looking at her pussy.

The other experience I had was I went to the brothel in Ellemere Port (The Office). There were two women there, the 'maid' and the sex worker. The maid was a woman I hadn't seen before. She told me the name of the sex worker but I didn't recognize it. She wouldn't let me have a look at the sex worker before I gave her the money. She said I would have to give her £10, refundable if I decided to stay. They tend to do that there. They can have some ugly and old women working there. I said I'll just go elsewhere. I don't mind older women if they are attractive but I didn't want to take that chance.

I got on the train to Rock Ferry and went to the Thai place. Rock Ferry Thai Massage. The old woman said there are two girls there but one of them is in the room below. The one available for me was Annie who was older and not pretty but quite sexy. I asked Annie what did the old woman mean by the room below. She told me that for customers who paid for an hour they could go to this room where they have extra facilities. I can't remember if she said a bath or a jacuzzi.

If I paid £100 I could do that and it sounded nice. No doubt the man who was doing it had the prettier of the two women available. Maybe the pretty girl was in the bath with him. I will have to try it when things get back to normal. I had a good time with Annie. This place is not really about massage. I had penetrative sex with her and I orgasmed even though I was using one of her condoms not my own thinner ones.

review of Paid For by Rachel Moran part 4

The message of this book is that women are forced to become prostitutes because of poverty. Early in the book she says that she had the opportunity of living with a family but she declined the offer because she felt contaminated by prostitution. This was before the 1993 law which made life more difficult for prostitutes when she had to have penetrative sex (although she never had anal sex).

"These things felt too pure for me, or rather, I felt too dirty for them." Chapter 8 page 70

So even she had another option. She felt she couldn't take this other option because she felt contaminated. It sounds as if it was attitudes to sex in Ireland that were causing the problem. Attitudes to sex are changing in Ireland but the traditional culture is that the most acceptable women are those who don't have sex - the nuns. Priests and monks aren't supposed to have sex either. If you can't be a nun then you should be celibate before marriage then faithful after, so that you only have sex with one man ever.

"The prostitute knows that she lives in a society which, however saturated with sexual imagery, is still steeped in the veneration of virginity, and she has the wit to know that since she is placed on the opposite end of that spectrum she will not find herself venerated any time soon." Chapter 4 page 28

Lust is seen as lowering us to the level of the animals. Lust contaminates. Semen stains the soul. A prostitute who has had sex with hundreds of men has the lowest status. A wife shouldn't enjoy having sex with her husband. It's different for men, unless a man can become aroused then sex and conception won't be possible. So men can enjoy sex, but can't talk about it. Unless it's in the pub. Then it will be talked about in a vulgar way.

If you are raised to think that sex is animalistic then it's not surprising that when you have sex you behave in an animalistic way - or what you think is an animalistic way. Sex is associated with aggression and violence.

When I chose a bull to be my symbol for this blog it wasn't because I'm the sort of man who owns an aggressive breed of dog. A bull is not an aggressive animal, he uses his strength to defend himself and the herd. Christians think that to be reduced to the level of an animal is the worst thing. Others who have a secular or a pagan way of thinking don't believe that. We have drives that we share with animals, we seek out food and sex, and there is no need to suppress these drives. It's when we suppress these drives that aggression arises.

I've just said that secular people don't think this way, but some do. The philosopher Kant was secular but he invented the theory of objectification to find a secular reason why sex outside of marriage is wrong. A philosopher should be able to challenge the attitudes of the society he lives in and not try to find new ways to justify them.

My family were secular but had old-fashioned attitudes to sex. Very common at the time. I have tried to overcome the inhibitions I gained in childhood. It seems that one group of feminists persist with these old-fashioned attitudes. Roman Catholics, Evangelical Protestants and Radical Feminists use each others' false statistics to try to ban prostitution. In the Irish Republic, Northern Ireland and Sweden they have persuaded governments.

When the nuns who ran the Magdalen laundries showed aggression towards the young women and girls incarcerated there it was because of suppressed sexual desire. It was a hatred and fear of sex and a disgust at people who they thought freely expressed their sexual feelings.

When a man who has been steeped in this culture visits a brothel he's going to think that the thing to do is behave like an animal. Or what he thinks to behave like an animal would be. He will tend to be disrespectful and even aggressive towards the sex worker. He might enjoy the feeling that he is raping the woman.

There is another book about prostitution in Ireland. It is called Slave by Anna. In this book a woman is kidnapped on the streets of London and taken to Ireland. She is raped many times. Some of the other women she meets are taken to Northern Ireland and Sweden but none of them are taken to London or Manchester. This is curious. There are plenty of brothels in London and Manchester. The only way we can explain this is by saying that some Catholics in the Irish Republic and Evangelicals in Northern Ireland like to have brutal sex. They think that is what sex is - brutal and animalistic.

There are no cases that I am aware of in Britain where a woman has been kidnapped from the streets and raped. If you read in the newspapers about cases of men and women prosecuted for trafficking they don't involve coercion.

It's no coincidence that it is the Irish Republic and Northern Ireland who have introduced the Nordic model where the idea is that men are prosecuted for paying for sex. They have ignored all the evidence that shows that it doesn't work. The 1993 law made things worse for sex workers (as Moran says herself) and the more recent Nordic model makes things worse still. Moran says nothing about women kidnapped and raped in early 1990s Ireland.

The worse it gets the more examples they can give of women damaged by prostitution. They can renew their efforts to stamp it out. The more they try to stamp it out the worse it gets. Just like in prohibition America. Or the war against drugs. But they are the ones who have created this situation. And they have no interest in eliminating the poverty that they say is the cause of prostitution. They want to take away this way of escaping poverty.

In Ireland sex workers feel impure and feel they can't escape. They are more likely to find sex repulsive and the men who pay for sex make it even more repulsive by their attitude. Religious people call for harsher laws which make things even worse. The worse it gets the more they want to crack down on it.

There are two things that could change the face of prostitution in Britain. One of them is the anti-HIV drug called PrEP, and the other is Brexit.

Lots of gay men take PrEP. It can be bought over the internet but they can also get it for free if they join an impact trial. It's not really a trial, they just keep an eye on you at the Sexual Health clinic and test your kidney function etc. They do regular HIV and other STD checks. It's not just for gay men, anyone can go on it. For someone like me who has had unprotected sex with sex workers recently it's good and it would be good for sex workers too.

I found out about it just a couple of months ago and now I'm on it. It's not for people who have HIV, it's for people who want to avoid contracting it. It's effective if taken properly. I'm one of the few heterosexual people on the impact trial, and they're happy to have more straight men. The trials will end this year but the doctor said she'll still give it to me. People will still be able to go on it.

As I said I gave up seeing sex workers over the winter. Now it's spring I've been thinking who to see. Number one on my list is my African lady in Manchester. I have seen her several times and shagged her without a condom. I've had a couple of HIV tests since so I know I haven't got it.

However, it seems that she has chosen this springtime to go on holiday. I look at the twitter page of this brothel and it says who is there next day. There is nearly always a choice of three women. She's not been there for a couple of weeks now but this is what happens. So I expect she'll be back. I'll be ready for her. I don't want to make the trip to Manchester if it's not sunny and dry which is one reason why I tend not to go in winter. It's a nice day out.

I'm old enough to remember that in Soho before Aids they would say "£10 for sex with condom, £15 without". If PrEP becomes commonly used, is it possible that we might go back to that? I doubt it, there are other STDs apart from HIV and condoms make it so much nicer for sex workers.

I can imagine though that some enterprising young lady could be a bit imaginative and offer a wider range of services, for a price. She could offer sex with an ultra-thin condom. They're just as safe, but instead of the customer bringing his own, she would have a range of different brands available. That way she could be sure they aren't old or have been tampered with. She could offer to use a female condom which she would insert before sex.

She could take PrEP every day and offer unprotected sex, perhaps only with a regular customer she likes. There could be a PrEP club, where unprotected sex is available on the understanding that both the sex worker and her clients are taking it every day.

I stopped taking it every day when I realized that my African lady isn't there at the moment. But now I've started again because I've heard that anti-viral drugs like PrEP are being tested to see if they can stop people getting coronavirus. There are two ways to take it: either just take one tablet a day, or only take it befor and after you know you're going to have unprotected sex according to instructions.

Brothels are closing because of coronavirus (COVID-19). Overpool Angels is now shut.

Number two on my list of desirable ladies is the young oriental woman called Sara who I have mentioned in previous posts. She's not always working in Chester but she was recently. I texted her and asked her if I could use an ultra-thin condom and she replied yes. On her page on Vivastreet she said she would be there until Monday the ninth of March. However, when I texted her on Monday she said that she'd left Chester.

I was hoping to put a link to her Vivastreet page here for you but it seems to not function now. That's a pity because there were photos of her and a video of her doing a sexy little dance. I can put a screenshot of the page here though.

My third choice would be Eva the Spanish girl at Overpool Angels. I'm not sure she's there this year though, especially considering we've left the EU. They can't just get on a coach and turn up at Victoria coach station anymore. Having said that though, girls like Sara from Asia don't seem to have that much of a problem.

I was told by a Brazilian woman that often they say they are Italian to get to EU countries. Many Brazilians have Italian ancestry and that gives them permission to come here.

Since Eastern European countries joined the EU there have been large numbers of women coming to Britain to work as prostitutes. In some places they outnumber British women. It could be that British women are reluctant to compete against them on price. Could it be that in the future there will be fewer sex workers in Britain and the price for sexual services will be higher? That's a possibility.

Maggie Mae

I have just found out that there was a traditional song about prostitution in Liverpool. The Beatles were one of the groups that sang it.

Oh dirty Maggie Mae they have taken her away
And she never walk down Lime Street any more
Oh the judge he guilty found her
For robbing a homeward bounder
That dirty no good robbin' Maggie Mae
To the port of Liverpool
They returned me to
Two pounds ten a week, that was my pay.

I didn't realize that Lime Street was the Red Light District of Liverpool at one time. I also didn't realise that Maggie was the slang word for prostitute.

You would think it would be somewhere nearer the docks, because of all the sailors. I did locate somewhere near the docks in Liverpool but it was outcall only so I forgot about it. It might have been Secrets Escorts. I always wondered how that worked. Women would go to hotels near the docks where their customers were staying. If a man was resident on a ship would he try to smuggle a woman on board? Perhaps several men would invite one woman to be with them overnight.

Anyone would think you haven't seen a woman for months!

I read that there used to be a system where a sailor would stay with a woman overnight in her house or flat. She would cook for him, perhaps an evening meal and breakfast the next day. They would spend the night together. Sex workers often like to have a number of regular clients. Then they don't have to continue to find men.

That's a much better system than street prostitution, the sort that I encountered in Hope Street in the 1980s. Another system could be if there was a large room with tables and chairs. The room is divided into two. Women would come in through one door and men through another. The men could look at the women, a man could ask to talk to one he likes. Or she could ask to talk to him. They could agree a price then go to a bedroom. It's not a brothel, women would pay an hourly rate for a room.

Women would not be employees there. They would go there when they feel like it, perhaps with their friends. If they needed the money that day or if someone was looking after the kids. A woman could go as frequently or as infrequently as she liked. It would be a bit like a hotel.

There is also Temple Spa 21 near the centre of Liverpool, at 21 Temple Street. If you pay their minimum price you get a massage and a topless wank. If you pay more she will take all her clothes off.

Paul Curtis has created a mural of Maggie Mae, who was apparently a real person.

The Duke of Westminster

I have just finished reading the biography of Gerald Grosvenor, the 6th Duke of Westminster. It is called The Reluctant Billionaire by Tom Quinn. There was a big scandal a few years ago when it was revealed that Grosvenor had spent lots of money on high-class prostitutes.

A journalist had interviewed a number of these girls and this is what he said:-

"They told me that it was either being an escort girl or doing cleaning jobs, which paid almost nothing and were often degrading. One said, 'If I had stayed at home it was poverty - no job, no life, no fun. In London I could live like a princess but only working as an escort girl. I could have been a cleaner or worked in a coffee bar for the minimum wage so I had to choose. I thought it would be better to sleep with the super-rich - even if they were old and boring and sometimes ugly!'"

Despite being a billionaire, Grosvenor didn't usually ask for the most expensive of the escorts from the agency that he used. They would have cost £5,000 per hour. Instead he usually paid between £500 and £1,000 per hour. The most expensive option would have been to pay £30,000 for one of the most expensive escorts to spend the whole day or night with him, but we don't know if he ever did that.

Of course, this is at the opposite end of what I have been doing, spending £50 or less for half an hour. In Soho, I used to spend £20 for 10 minutes. I think it is still true though that nearly all sex workers in Britain are not coerced and could work as a cleaner or in a coffee bar. The Radical Feminists and the Evangelical Christians tell people that women are coerced by violent pimps and not paid or they are in danger of homelessness or hunger.

Migrants come to Britain to avoid homelessness or hunger. Most don't choose sex work. They work as cleaners, in a coffee bar or somewhere else. Cleaners can be victims of modern day slavery and so can others, including sex workers. This is rare though.

The escorts said that Grosvenor was boring and the opposite of generous, but he wasn't abusive. I've often wondered why abusers like Jimmy Savile and Rolf Harris did what they did. They could have paid for beautiful escort girls, as Gerald Grosvenor did, but instead they seemed to want to harm and upset women and girls.

One aspect of this book is that there is an attempt to explain why Grosvenor wanted to see escorts. It's as if people think that it is such aberrant behaviour that it needs to be explained psychologically, as a personality flaw caused by childhood unhappiness. It is said that he had a loveless childhood and was traumatised by his boarding school. This would have caused him to seek sex without involvement.

Yet we know that he was married, so it's not as if he avoided involvement. People sometimes think that men who pay for sex are unwilling or unable to form relationships. They pay for it because they can't get it in the usual way.

When you think what his ancestor, the 2nd Duke of Westminster, got up to it is difficult to see the 6th Duke as such a flawed person. The 2nd Duke - Hugh Grosvenor - and his contemporaries did not lead peaceful and contented lives. Drunkenness, divorce, promiscuity, casual relationships, gambling-addiction, suicide and drug-taking were very much part of their lives. The Queen had an uncle, Prince George Duke of Kent, who was a drug addict.

Gerald Grosvenor married Natalia Phillips. Her father was Bunny Phillips, who was Lady Mountbatten's lover. I was already aware of some of Lady Mountbatten's lovers (Leslie Hutchinson, Lord Molyneaux and Laddie Sanford) but Bunny Phillips was one I hadn't heard of. It seems you don’t have to be ladylike to be a Lady.

The aristocrat with the most interesting love life of the inter-war period, the period of Hugh Grosvenor and Lady Mountbatten, was Marmaduke Furness - 1st Viscount Furness. He had 3 wives. He was accused of murdering his first wife*. If he had been found guilty he would have been hanged, but it is said that as a peer of the realm it would have been with a silken rope.

His second wife was Thelma Morgan. As Thelma Furness she became mistress of the Prince of Wales and lover of Aly Khan (playboy son of the Aga Khan). His third wife was Enid Lindeman. He was her third husband (she had tried to get Hugh Grosvenor interested in her). She smoked opium and injected heroin. She had been married to a Brigadier General in Cairo and it is said she had sex with the entire regiment for a dare*.

Drinking and betting are a part of many if not most people's lives. Few people have long and happy marriages. If I buy bottles of whisky or lose money on a bet nobody will think it odd. Yet if I spend the same amount of money on spending time with a beautiful naked woman people think that it needs explanation. I've never understood the attraction of getting drunk or betting, I prefer to spend my money on more sensible things.

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*Since writing this I have read more about these characters. It seems that the book I had read about them (The Mistress of Mayfair by Lyndsy Spence) is not accurate. It was only gossip that said Marmaduke Furness has murdered his first wife, no formal accusations were made, although the circumstances of her death and burial were unusual. Enid Lindeman was not a heroin addict. She - Enid Cavendish as she was then - did not have sex with the entire regiment, only the officers. So that's alright then.

local girls

I have said before that most men would want a sex worker who is young, tall, slender and pretty. I have found a couple of those locally in the last couple of months. Eva is Spanish and works at Overpool Angels in Overpool. Lily is English and works at The Office in Ellesmere Port. Both are a short walk from the Merseyrail stations, just one stop apart. I have seen Eva three times and Lily four times. Both have let me use my ultra thin condoms.

The combination of viagra and ultra thin condoms means that I can get and keep an erection easily and orgasm. I gave Eva £45 each time and Lily £50. I could have paid just £40 to see Lily but I gave her an extra £10 for oral sex without a condom. That's for half an hour. Much better value than Blackpool and about the same as Manchester.

I went to an older woman's house in Chester (Jackie) after I saw her ad in a local paper. She was nice and I was sure I would see her again but that was before I met Eva and Lily.

I saw Lily again on Tuesday this week. I had to wait to see her so I sat with the older woman, who I fancy. She had an American drama on the TV and she was also playing a game on her tablet. She asked me to help with the general knowledge. I tried flirting with her, reminding her of what we did together, but she made it clear that she didn't 'work the room' anymore. There were several phone calls and a man came to the door.

Lily is getting a bit picky now that she's becoming popular. She doesn't really like men coming inside her, she prefers it if they come on her tits. She let me use one of my condoms to begin with but then said could we change to a regular one. Then she said she wanted me to come on her tits. We tried, but it didn't work.

I left without having had an orgasm but I went one stop along to Overpool Angels. A woman opened the door. Eva wasn't there. I told her I wasn't going to hand over my money until I saw the sex worker, so that I could see if I fancied her. I sat on a corner of the bed and in walked another woman who I recognised as the 'maid' from previous visits. She's older, but I really fancied her.

It's funny that in February this year I went to Sheridans in Salford for the first time. I walked out because they tried to give me a much older woman. Most men who were expecting to see a young, tall, slender and pretty girl in her 20s like Eva would have walked out - if they hadn't paid already. I thought I would have a nice time with this older woman and I was right. I said I would have her if she let me use one of my ultra thin condoms like Eva does. She said fine, a condom's a condom.

She said her name's Amber. I think she's mixed race, she said she's naturally brown. She's quite small, with a small pretty face. I enjoyed shagging her, even more that Eva, and to judge from the look on her face she enjoyed it too. I orgasmed inside her. Afterwards she told me she had to fill in for Eva at short notice. Eva had remembered she had an appointment. I learned several interesting things from Amber talking to her afterwards.

She told me the reason why I had never been offered the bigger room with the four-poster bed when I'd come to see Eva. They keep it for other clients, but I won't go into the details. I asked her about young Italian Roberta, who I had shagged on the four-poster in June. Amber said that they had gone together on holiday to Mexico but Roberta didn't want to continue sex work.

Roberta told Amber that she was annoyed that none of the men came to see her again. She had been expecting that she would have regular clients, who would see her and no one else. That didn't happen, even though she gave them more than the minimum. I had hoped to see Roberta again but she wasn't there, so I saw Eva.

I guess my favourite age for a sex worker is about 40. I'm happy to go younger or older if I find them attractive. I can find a woman attractive even when she's not conventionally attractive. A smile or a laugh can be as important as a pretty face.

I'm giving up paying for sex for this winter. It's not as much fun in winter. I might start again in the spring. I'm trying to restrict my spending for a while. When my finances improve, I'm sure that I will continue: I can't think of any better way of spending £50 than having half an hour with an attractive woman.

You have to go round to the back of this row of shops. Look for the open gate with the number 30A. Go up the stairs to heaven with the angels. The two windows lit up above Bespoke Care Cheshire Ltd is where the room with the four poster bed is.